The day I heard this song in 2018, as I was packing up my stuff with no destination in sight, was my very first encounter with it. I remember sitting on the floor of my rented room amidst a sea of boxes trying my best to hold it together. Part of me wanted to just fold–give up. While the other part of me was desperately clinging to the feet of Jesus. There had to be a reason things had turned out this way. But there wasn’t time to process what had just transpired over the past three months. I was just trying not to fall apart. All I knew was that my heart was broken, my spirit was crushed, and at times I thought I was going to lose my mind.
I don’t think anyone would’ve blamed me for chucking up deuces and saying “Peace out!” after what I had experienced. This could’ve literally taken me out had I not been at the place I was in my relationship with God. I probably would’ve walked away from everything–including Him. But something inside of me wouldn’t let me slip down into the darkness that used to be a place of comfort for me in the past. I knew there had to be a bigger purpose. I couldn’t imagine Him bringing me this far just to leave me. Though I was too broken at the time to even think straight, something in my heart just wouldn’t let Him go.
As I listened to the words of this song, I started to remember the journey. I remembered the day He saved me in my room. I remembered how He carried me through the death of my mom. I remembered the many ways in which He blessed me. I remembered the miraculous work He had done in my heart during the 10 years I’d lived in Cali. And though it appeared that everything in my life had seemingly imploded right before my eyes, at that moment my heart began to fill with an abundance of overwhelming gratitude.
It wasn’t over. This wasn’t the end of me. I was still here! God’s amazing grace and mercy were keeping me. I began to give God the glory in the midst of my brokenness, unanswered questions, fractured faith, and crazy thoughts. Though things didn’t look good on the outside and didn’t feel good on the inside, He was still GOOD. And because He was GOOD all I could say was thank you–Thank you for my life!
I pray that as you listen to this song that it will bring you to a place of overwhelming gratitude and love for the One who loved you first!
Until next time…Be Blessed & Go Forth In Faith…Smooches 😘😘
P.S. If you haven’t heard my testimony you can check it out here!