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Day 18-The Soundtrack to My Life!

Come Back Home by Donavan Henry

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The song for today is Come Back Home by Donavan Henry. This song is deeply personal and special to me because it’s been my very own personal song for 20+ years. It has never been officially released and for many years I was the only one that had a copy of it. But with permission from my amazing brother in Christ, Donavan Henry, I am sharing that song with you today.

The post for today is actually an edited repost. I originally posted this story below on Facebook on September 28, 2018. I am sharing it again here. I pray that it blesses you.

September 28, 2018

Deep breathe!  On August 28, 2018, I boarded a plane home to Chicago with a one-way ticket not knowing what the future held for me or what to expect.  As the plane taxied down the runway for takeoff, all I knew for sure was that my season in Cali was over and that I was leaving with a gaping hole in my heart. Though I was grateful for the time spent there, I was deeply saddened by the way things had ended. 

It had been 9 years since I had left the comforts of home with nothing more than a word from God. And with that word alone, like Abraham, I packed my bags and left everything I knew for the promise of the unknown. I don’t think my mind could’ve comprehended what would take place over those 9 years. I think if I would’ve known I probably would’ve stayed…Lol! Because it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows. It was a lot of deep, heart-wrenching internal work. Talk about being molded on the potter’s wheel! I was stretched, smashed, rolled into a ball, put in the fire, scrapped, chiseled, buffed, and polished. But I emerged a new woman. It was an experience I still wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. 

God is so intentional! He has a way of doing things that can’t be explained. I mean they go way beyond our natural understanding. Yesterday for some strange reason I charged up my old cell phone and decided to listen to some music while I fell asleep. While I was lying there it dawned on me that over the past 19 years, God had used songs to highlight the beginning and end of seasons in my life. In the midst of that thought, Come Back Home comes on and I realize it’s been exactly one month since I’ve been back home in Chicago.  My 9 year season in Cali had come to an end. “Wow, Lord!”  I thought to myself. “I know this isn’t just a mere coincidence.”  So then I asked, “What are you trying to say or show me, Lord?”  And like he always does, He began to reveal what all this meant for me. 

The song already had great significance to me because the day He sent me this song was the day He invited me into a deeper and more intimate relationship with Him. He had literally saved my life just a few months prior but that day He was after something else–my heart. 

I’ll never for the day…

I was sitting on my bed reading my journals and reflecting on the past year when I suddenly got very sad.  There was a particular relationship in my life that was incomplete. I had given all that I could over the past 7 years and was pondering in my heart why I wasn’t enough. I felt like I had been chasing after him and trying to convince him to love me, but my pursuit and attempts were never enough. And at that moment, as clear as a bell, I heard the voice of the Lord say to me “Just as you have been chasing after him, I’ve been chasing after you.” I immediately burst into tears as the love I had been looking for in all the wrong places embraced me.

As I sat there sobbing, I saw something glittering out of the corner of my eye. When I wiped my tears I saw a gold CD sitting on my bookcase. Now I have to tell you that this CD was NOT there before! I still to this day have no idea where it came from other than the Lord put it there himself 🤔. 

Something compels me to get up and play the CD out of curiosity. I hit play and realized that it was one of my brother’s CDs from school. He would bring home a copy of his final project from Berklee of songs that he and his friends had written and produced to share with us. I remember that the first song played but then the CD player started skipping by itself and kept landing on track14. I kept trying to get it to play all the way through but it kept skipping up to track 14. I finally gave up and let it play and it was Come Back Home. 

See when I heard this song nineteen years ago the promise of Him being everything that I would need was foreign and scary. What would that look like? How would it all work out? I was unsure.  What did this predestined future he had for me look like? What would I have to do or give up to have it? How far would I have to be willing to go? I didn’t have the answers that day. But what I did have was a quiet yes in my heart. I knew that what I had tried up to that point hadn’t worked and just months prior, right here in this very same place he had rescued me. So the promise of HIM being EVERYTHING I needed if I just gave him my heart seemed far better than continuing to chase after someone who wasn’t chasing after me. That day I surrendered my heart with all its brokenness, hurt, fear, doubt, and pain for the hope of His promise. 

As I listened to this song last night, I found comfort as He extended a new invitation to me to surrender my broken heart and walk with Him into a new season as I continued the process of Becoming who He called me to be…And I happily replied–YES!

END OF 9/28/18 POST

You know that phrase, Home is where the heart is? Well, it’s true. Where is your heart? Have you given it to Him or are you holding on to it for dear life? Have you given your life to Him but not your heart? Have you been keeping Him at arm’s length? I encourage you today to search your heart to see where it really is. 

I pray that as you listen to this song no matter where you find yourself on your journey you continue to say yes. Continue to say yes to every invitation to come closer, to go deeper, to let go, to heal, to forgive, to repent, and to surrender because He is faithful to His promises. He loves you and is patiently waiting for you to come back home and place your heart in His capable hands.

Well, that’s all I have for you today!

Until next time…Be Blessed & Go Forth In Faith…Smooches 😘😘

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